An explanation…

Hey guys, I know it’s been a while…

I’ve finally come out of hiding and resurfaced in Eurovision land. So I’m writing this blog to kind of explain as best I can why.

Well, a big part of it is that I got really distracted doing other projects. “I’ll organise a podcast next week”, I kept saying to myself. And then that week turned into two, which turned into a month, which turned into three months. And to be honest, I really wasn’t planning to take this long of a break. It just sort of happened that way.

Why was I so distracted doing other projects? Because I felt I needed to. I got severe FOMO being stuck at home during Eurovision week while all my friends were onsite and having fun, so I deliberately looked for something to do once it finished to stave off Post Eurovision Depression. And I have to say that it worked. This was the first time in many years that I didn’t remotely get PED. And I’ll admit, it’s been real nice.

Also, despite being at home, I still picked up a wave of nastiness and negativity from the fandom this year that I felt that I needed to take a “Eurovision vacation” so to speak. I know that the fandom has been increasingly overdramatic in recent years, but I especially felt it really hard this year. When people weren’t making fun of other fans’ tastes in songs, they were being borderline abusive towards the actual artists. Either for not being a rake-thin model or having a rather marmite song and taking out their frustrations on the artist themselves. I don’t even need to name names for you to know which artists I’m referring to. And shock horror, those artists and their respective delegations were rattled by this.

I don’t take negativity well, it’s been well documented for anyone that knows me. I’ve struggled with my own negative thoughts over the last few years as it is without picking up on everyone else’s. And I felt especially bad for those artists because they seem like genuine, nice people who just want to do the things they love and entertain people. They have enough pressure on themselves to perform well as it is without getting hit with a wave of nasty social media comments for what I perceive to be stupid reasons. To me, Eurovision should be a fun and inclusive event, and if this continues, what artists would want to willingly subject themselves to that kind of abuse? The phrase “this is why we can’t have nice things” springs to mind, and hopefully we won’t end up in this predicament in the future.

I’m not saying that a performance/song shouldn’t be criticised, or that we shouldn’t dish out harsh criticism when it’s DESERVED *cough Waylon cough*, I’m just saying that sometimes you can take it too far and what should be constructive criticism devolves into personal insults. And I don’t know about you guys, but that’s not cool in my book.

Anyway, I’m not saying that I’ve lost interest in Eurovision or that I don’t want to be a part of the community anymore (because to be honest I personally HATE it when people bleat on about that and I don’t want to be one of those people), but I will admit that this deliberate exile from Eurovision land has been really good for me. I hope you understand.

I don’t know if I’ll be able to get the funds to go to Israel next May, but I hope you guys don’t see my opinion as worthless because I’m stuck at home, because that’s how I really felt earlier this year and it really sucked.

I don’t know when the podcast will be back, but hopefully we can organise at least one before JESC comes along. And hopefully I’ll be back in full festive “yay Eurovision!” mode by then.


With love, Kylie x


Author: Kylie Wilson

Editor-in-chief of ESC Pulse. A British-New Zealander who's an unashamed Norwegophile, has watched Eurovision every year since 1999, and is not afraid to speak her mind and step outside the general consensus.

One thought on “An explanation…”

  1. Kylie,

    Yes, I did wonder what had happened, but not in a demanding way. Only in a way that hoped nothing bad had happened to you and the contributors to the podcast and this wonderful website. I noted that a lot of Eurovision podcasts and programmes take a brake for several weeks if not months after the Eurovision Song Contest because, let’s face it, nothing is happening. So for me I like the ESC, but have a full-time job and other stuff to do. Thus from mid-May my time has been taken up with the 2018 World Cup, 2019 Women’s World Cup (European Zone qualifiers & playoffs) – I fully expect New Zealand to qualify by winning the 2018 OFC Women’s Nations Cup 18 Nov-1 Dec, UEFA Women’s Champions League, visiting friends, american football (NCAA & NFL), preliminary and qualifying rounds of the FA Cup, doing stuff around my mom’s bungalow, and my full-time job with important projects to complete.

    So, thanks for the podcast, reviews of previous Eurovision, videos and this website. Your time and effort and those of the contributors is much appreciated. Take your time and I look forward to the podcasts etc. when they return. From what I’ve seen, Eurovision doesn’t really pick up until after the Junior version has finished.

    Southampton, England

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